I am currently over in Mexico, solo traveling, and it has been a very enjoyable but fascinating experience so far. One of the main things I have been very aware of is how much I talk to myself and of all the crazy things I say to myself on a daily, hourly basis! And further, looking back to roughly 3/4 years ago, this voice would have been even crazier.
I have made a lot of processes over the years, having focused on self-development, yoga practice, and therapy - but the number one thing that has come from having therapy is being aware of my inner voice and the thoughts inside my head.
What is negative self-talk?
First of all, if you haven’t a clue what I am talking about when I say 'the voice inside my head' - just stop for a second and listen. I am talking about that voice. Right there. The voice is either saving us for good or seeing us for bad.
Researchers estimate that we think about 50,000 to 70,000 thoughts a day – and that about 80% of those thoughts are negative. That is a lot of negative self-talk!
So how do you make a change and become aware of your inner voice?
Step one: Journal. Write everything down.
If you don’t have time to do that then voice noting yourself, as this is a really easy way of voicing what is going on inside. I think this is one of the hardest steps. Most people go through their day thinking it's normal to talk shit to themselves, because it’s become a habit.
Anything that is a habit takes a little bit more work to break. Depending on how long you have had this habit depends on how much it is embedded into the subconscious part of your brain. Self-talk is one of the things that is also holding you back from doing or becoming who you want to be.
I would recommend that you set reminders on your phone to check in on what you are saying to yourself across a 5-7 day timeframe. Get it all down on paper. Look at what you have written down and ask yourself - is it true? I can guarantee the answer is no, no, and nooooo! You may think it's true because this is what you have been telling yourself - but it isn’t.
When you realise it's not true you can finally set it free.
When you have it down in black and white you can now start to reprogram the self-talk and change it to something that will positively serve you. If you are struggling to find what you say to yourself you can answer this question in all areas of your life. How are you limiting yourself or holding yourself back?
Step two: Affirmations, visualisations and focusing on the physical
Writing affirmations can help you flip the switch and re-write the narrative on self-talk. You can re-write with a different perspective, say it out loud and change the script running through your head.
How do you write an affirmation? Take the limiting belief or negative self-talk and turn it completely on its head. For example;
Negative: I am scared of failing.
Turned to: Fear is only a feeling; it cannot hold me back.
I have recently uploaded some positive affirmations onto my Instagram so go check them out. I highly recommend having fun with affirmations. I like to do them dancing to music, when I am working out or at the end of a yoga practice.
If you need help working on your negative self-talk, I have recently launched my 1-1 tailored mentorship program where we can create personalised meditations with positive affirmations integrated to help you truly flip the switch. Included are some 1-1 Zoom sessions, where I'll also help you with other exercises for improving mindset and getting the best out of your thoughts.